My Baby Boy, Merlin

On February 6, 2021, my baby boy, Merlin crossed over. If you’re a cat lover like me, you know that they are part of the family; therefore, their passing causes great grief. In this blog post I will write about how he came into my life, his final months, and the joy his life brought me.

My Baby Boy, Merlin

I’m pretty sure this was my first reading with Amanda Cooper when her guides informed me of a white cat coming into my life. Another psychic told me the feng shui in my home was about to change. Both readings were spot on.

Merlin Enters My Life

Birdy Bird, my parakeet at the time, needed food, so I went to PetSmart in Rockaway, NJ in June 2009. It was adoption day, and I noticed a sleeping white kitten (born 4-28-09). I asked the lady if I could hold him. This kitten let me hold him like a baby in my folded arms, next he climbed up to put his arms on my shoulder while he licked my face. He climbed back down and repeated the same actions. I was smitten!

I spoke to one of my guides, Merlin, about how much I wanted this kitten. And if my landlady (at the time) granted permission for me to adopt him, I would name him after my guide. The rest is history…

Merlin as a kitten
Merlin as a kitten

The Bruiser

My baby boy, Merlin, was a wild kitten. That summer, as soon as one scratch mark healed on my body, he gifted me with another. He destroyed my comforter, toys, lampshade, and shower curtain. Hence, the nickname – The Bruiser.

Merlin’s Personality

Yes, Merlin was a cat; however, he had human and dog like characteristics. He loved to be held, which is so unusual for a cat. And would get mad when I would say, “I need to put you down” because the big boy was heavy!

He was super friendly to everyone, except one man who turned out to be a narcissist – smart boy. Merlin loved being the center of attention and everyone loved him! Even my shy kitty, Rhiannon, loved him. Except when he behaved like the alpha cat he was and bullied her.

My baby boy, Merlin, was so intelligent. He could do high five, follow me, and jump up as long as treats were being offered. Getting him to sit was a challenge, although when I told him, “Binx sits for Cynthia (my niece and her cat)” – he immediately sat down for me.

It took patience and persistence to walk him, or I should I say for him to walk me with his collar/harness on. We went outside together for four years and ten months.

I could go on and on with stories about my baby boy, Merlin….

Merlin on the Porch
Merlin hanging out on the porch.

Merlin’s Vet Trauma

Bringing Merlin to the vet was always a dreaded affair! It wasn’t always that way. Until it traumatized him when I took him to PetSmart in Morehead City, NC, at the suggestion of dog owners I knew and to save money. Big mistake! The technician came in, shoved a thermometer up his butt, and the plastic got stuck in there. HISS! Thus began the journey of the stressful vet visits!

My Baby Boy, Merlin Last Days

There were early indications that my baby boy, Merlin, was having health issues. During a reading in October 2020, Amanda Cooper asked me what was going on with Merlin. Then my partner, Chris, suggested that I make a vet appointment because Merlin was losing weight in hips and back legs. Plus, I had a dream about him being very loving and desiring to spend time with me. I also had six more dreams before his departure.

Before taking Merlin to the vet, she asked me to give him pills that calmed him down, which I hated giving him. According to the blood test, he had low blood counts, yet everything else was okay. With medications, vitamin B, and instructions to give iron rich food, I went home. For the follow-up visit, I managed to get more of the calming pill into him. He was actually pretty good and they fed him kitten food, while the vet tried to take another blood sample three times. She wasn’t able to, maybe because his blood was thick?

Sure, the vet could have put him under with anesthesia and taken a bone marrow sample to see if it was bone cancer. However, one of my father’s cat died while being under anesthesia. More importantly, I didn’t want his last days to be filled with trips to the vet, medicines, and medical procedures. Rather, I wanted him to enjoy the rest of his life at home. I intuitively knew those were Merlin’s wishes also.

Merlin in the Leaves
Merlin in the leaves prior to his death.

Taking Care of Baby Boy, Merlin

Merlin spent time with Chris and Rhiannon, his sibling rivalry (from another mother). Yet, it was his mommy that pampered him most. On nice days, we went outside two or three times a day from anywhere from a half hour to an hour each time. When it was windy, I did my best to block the wind. During bad weather, I would hold him while doing a tour of our house.

Since Merlin loved to be held, he would often request me to hold him. Or I would pick up instead, sometimes standing or sitting in front of the window in the sun. One day, I held him for an hour. During these times, I talked, kissed/petted him, channeled healing energy to relieve the pain, or just enjoyed the moment.

The last couple of weeks he hung out in my office on my desk or file cabinet that had a soft flannel pillow case to lay on and dish towel for his food and water. His litter box was also there. He was such a trooper, being able to walk and eat even on his last day.

Sadly, I wasn’t with him when he took his last breath. During the night, my baby boy, Merlin walked up the cat steps onto the file cabinet, across my desk, and jumped onto the pillow of the office chair. My hope is that he died peacefully in his sleep, which I prayed for beforehand.

Life without Merlin

On the day of Merlin’s death, I felt a gigantic loving presence enveloped me. It was so beautiful and has happened since. My grief is intense! There’s an emptiness without him. Nevertheless, I am also relieved that he is no longer in pain and free…

What a gift my baby boy, Merlin was! My life has been forever blessed by his presence. Great love is worth the pain of loss.

Final Thoughts

To honor Merlin, I decided to create a deck for his memory. In the meantime, you can check out my first deck, Purrs for Humans, from the cats’ gurus, Merlin and Rhiannon.

*The deck I created is Merlin’s Purrfect Lenormand

Originally posted February 10, 2021

Merlin's Purrfect Lenormand
Merlins’ Purrfect Lenormand

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